How to decline a hen do politely
Declining an hen do invitiation can be a difficult and uncomfortable task, especially if the person inviting you is a close friend or family member.
However, there are some steps you can follow to decline a hen do and still make the process less stressful and ensure that everyone involved is left feeling respected and understood.
How do you get out of a hen weekend?
Step 1: Consider your reasons for declining
Before thinking about hot to decline an invitation to a hen weekend, it’s important to take some time to think about your reasons for doing so.
Are you feeling like you boundaries are being pushed too far? Are you not comfortable with the planned activities or location? Do you simply not want to attend a hen weekend? Perhaps you are feeling overwhelmed by the cost of a hen do.
Understanding your motivations will help you to articulate them clearly and respectfully when it comes time to decline the hen party invite.
Step 2: Be honest and direct (but kind!)
Once you’ve considered your reasons for declining a hen party, it’s time to be honest and direct about your decision.
Let’s look at some strategies for how to decline a hen do.
The earlier you can let the person inviting you know that you won’t be attending, the better. This will give them more time to make alternative arrangements and will also show that you respect their time and planning.
When declining the invitation, it’s important to be as clear and concise as possible. Let the person know that you won’t be able to attend the hen weekend, but try to avoid giving vague or confusing reasons for your decision.
If you’re not comfortable with the planned hen party activities or location, for example, say so. If you’re feeling overwhelmed with other commitments, let the person know. Being honest and direct will help to avoid misunderstandings and will show that you value the relationship.
Avoid overthinking how to decline a hen do, it’s best to keep it short and honest, but phrased in the nicest way you can manage.
Step 3: Offer alternatives
If you’re declining an invitation to a hen weekend because of other commitments or because you simply don’t want to attend, consider offering alternatives.
For example, you could suggest that you and the person inviting you spend some time together before or after the hen weekend, or that you plan a different kind of celebration together.
Offering alternatives will show that you care about the relationship and that you’re open to finding other ways to celebrate and spend time together.
Step 4: Be considerate of the bride’s feelings
Declining an invitation to a hen weekend can be difficult for the person inviting you, especially if they’re a close friend or family member.
It’s important to be considerate of their feelings and to take the time to understand their perspective before you decide how to decline a hen do. For example, they may have already invested time and money into planning the hen weekend and may be feeling disappointed or hurt by your decision to decline.
When declining an invitation, it’s important to be understanding and empathetic. Let the person know that you appreciate the invitation and that you’re sorry for any inconvenience or disappointment your decision may cause.
Offer to help in any way you can and be open to discussing the situation further if the person wants to talk about it.
Step 5: Follow up with a kind gesture
After declining an invitation to a hen weekend, consider following up with a kind gesture. For example, you could send a thoughtful card or gift for the bride, or simply reach out to the person to check in and see how they’re doing.
This will show that you care about the relationship and that you’re committed to maintaining it, even if you’re not able to attend the hen weekend.
Polite ways how to decline a hen do
Although we’re not ones for advocating the idea of “getting out of a hen weekend”, if you really need them here are some quick ideas of things you could say to get out of a hen do:
- Say you have a prior commitment
- Blame it on your finances
- Say you have to work
- Tell the bride you can’t get childcare
- Offer an alternative option
Of course these are just ideas of nice ways to get out of a hen do without hurting anyone’s feelings. Ultimately we would recommend being as honest as you can when it comes to declining a hen do, but try and balance it with not offending anyone involved.
How to say no to an expensive hen weekend
One of the most common reasons for declining a hen do is the cost. It’s a fact that hen celebrations have grown over the years and are now often a whole weekend or week of festivities.
These larger-scale events run into hundreds or sometimes even thousands of pounds, which of course is not financially viable for everyone.
If you need a way to say no to an expensive hen do then the best thing to do is to be honest about your situation.
- Message the bride and the maid of honour separately from the main hen do group
- Explain that attending would push you too far financially
- Suggest that you and the bride arrange an extra, less extravagant celebration to mark the occasion together.
You might be feeling a bit self-conscious or embarrassed about it if you can’t afford a hen weekend for your best friend, but there is no need. Everyone has a different financial situation with different salaries, jobs and commitments.
In conclusion, declining a hen weekend invitation can be a delicate situation, but it’s important to handle it in a way that is respectful and considerate to all parties involved.
Remember to be honest and clear, respond in a timely manner, use a polite tone, and offer an alternative if possible. Most importantly, be considerate of the bride-to-be’s feelings and offer to help in other ways if necessary.
If you follow these tips, declining a hen weekend invitation can be a smooth and stress-free process – but we hope you’ll be able to enjoy some of the hen parties you’re invited to in the future!
